What Makes A Good Egg Donor Agency

When you’ve made the important decision to start or expand your family through egg donation, the next vital step you need to take is to select a reputable egg donation agency.

A great egg donation agency is a bit like a doctor with a great bedside manner. An understanding best friend who is always willing to listen and an attentive councillor, who can guide you through challenging times all rolled into one! Infertility is a tough, lonely place – you need all the help you can get, to keep your sanity and your sense of humour in tact.

Not only will a good agency provide you with a large database of wonderful and carefully pre-screened egg donors to choose from, but it will ensure that you receive excellent service from them as well as from the fertility clinic where you will be treated, every step of the way. This means that there will be constant interaction and intervention between the agency, the fertility clinic and the egg donor, and that you will be kept well informed at all times during the process.

An egg donor program that is managed and facilitated by a really good egg donation agency, will help donor recipients to better understand the process, answer any and all questions with patience and clarity. This will save prospective recipients from the trouble of having to wade through and trying to comprehend any medical or legal issues that they would like to clarify.

In South Africa, egg donor agencies are primarily located in the major cities such as Cape Town, Johannesburg, Pretoria and Durban. In some instances, donor agencies have donors who are willing to travel to other cities to participate in the program.

When choosing a donor agency, prospective donor egg recipients need to explore important criteria such as the agency’s reputation, its affordability, efficiency, availability of egg donors, professionalism, the period of time it has been in existence, its association with top fertility clinics in the area and the quality of its service.

Another aspect that makes an egg donation agency excellent is its commitment to continuously expand and keep fresh its database of profiled egg donors by recruiting new donors. A great agency will also offer immediate feedback to any queries pertaining to egg donation fertility treatment.

A good egg donor agency doesn’t over promise and under-deliver. A good egg donor agency makes sure that all their donors that are listed as available, ARE available and meet the prescribed criteria. A good egg donor agency knows that by the time a recipient couple has reached the point of egg donation, they are tired, heartbroken and financially and emotionally depleted.

A good egg donor agency does their utmost to ensure that this is the last chapter of the journey that ends with the words “….and they all lived happily ever after”.

Contact Details for Nurture Egg Donor Program

Contact Person: Tertia Albertyn
Contact Number Local: 0824418639
Contact Number International: (+27824418639)
Website: www.nurture.co.za

A Nurture Egg Donor's story...

My experience as a Nurture Egg Donor…

I am one of the lucky ones… my husband and I conceived easily and I had 2 healthy, full-term pregnancies. I have been blessed with 2 beautiful, precious, extremely active boys. Many of my friends have not been as lucky, I have watched over the years as many of them struggled to fall pregnant and keep pregnancies. I have watched them go through IVF and even surrogacy and have always said to my husband ‘ I wish there was more I could do to help’.

A few months ago, I went to a fundraising talk for a school in our area and the speaker happened to talk on her experience with surrogacy. I was blown away! Tertia and Kim from the Nurture Egg Donor programme also spoke and presented the egg donation process. They mentioned that they only accepted donors until they were 33. My birthday was a few months away and I was nearing the deadline! I discussed it with my husband and friends and decided that this was something I really wanted to do. I felt like I could finally help someone, even if it was not a close friend, and I knew that if I did not do it now, I would miss the opportunity.

I contacted Nurture, filled in the application form and so the process began. I met with Melany, who explained the entire procedure to me. She answered all my questions and dealt with all of my concerns. She also detailed the risks involved are and exactly what I would be committing to. I have spoken at length about my decision with friends and family. A lot of the questions that were posed to me, were ones that my husband and I discussed prior to making the decision to donate. We were obviously concerned about the hormones I would be injecting, about the actual retrieval procedure, and about the fact that in 20 years time, one of our sons could meet and potentially like a young lady who has half of their genetic make-up!!! My husband is a doctor and after getting all the information from Melany regarding the hormones and actual procedure, he was very comfortable that it was low-risk and well-managed.

I got a phone call to say that my profile had been selected and then received a letter (via Melany) from my recipient. It was the most genuine, heartfelt, grateful letter I have ever received and after reading it and learning more about my recipient and her journey, I knew that I had made the right decision! I had to go for blood tests and a scan at the Cape Fertility Clinic. Dr Heylen and his staff were wonderful – very honest and professional and approachable. I felt extremely comfortable.

I know that a lot of people have found it difficult to understand that my need to help someone actually overrides the 10 days of hormone treatment and the fear of a procedure. The anaesthetic is very light one and I was home the same day. I really feel that 12 days of my life is a small sacrifice to make, to give someone else such a life-changing gift! I can find out (if the recipient couple will allow) the sex of the baby when it is born. This will allow me to discuss things easier with my sons. Once they are old enough to understand, I will have the conversation with them and explain to them, what I chose to do and why.

I have had the reactions I was expecting, like; ‘That is amazing, so selfless, what an awesome thing to do.’ I have also had some that I was not expecting; ‘You are mad! What if the kid comes looking for you in 18 years time?’ The way I look at it is that this is not ‘my’ child, I am not the Mother, I am merely giving potential…. I really feel that the recipient will carry the child and that the baby will be hers completely. I have also been asked; ‘wow, are you getting paid a fat sum of money for doing that?’ and have shut those people up, by explaining that I am not selling my eggs to some market! The money that I am being paid is for my time, travel costs and effort, which I have decided to donate to an NGO that has an awesome Mothers Programme. I want this to be a selfless act, with absolutely no financial gain!

I begin with the injections tomorrow and the retrieval date is booked for 12 days time. So, I will write after that to fill you all in on how that goes! I will certainly do everything I can and can only pray that this works for the recipient couple!!! I have found that it helps when I feel anxious, to put myself in their shoes…. They have far more at stake and put in perspective, I have nothing to be scared of and am inspired by their faith and perseverance. So far the experience has been a very positive, humbling one!!!

TBC….

SURROGACY Q&A

Nurture founder, Tertia Loebenberg answers questions around Surrogacy and IVF/Egg Donation and fertlity issues...

It seems about 25% of surrogacies require donor eggs - under what circumstances do surrogate couples require donor eggs?
When a woman is unable to get pregnant, or stay pregnant, and it has been established that female fertility issues are the cause. The reasons why, could be grouped into two main categories: the quality of her eggs could be inadequate to conceive (due to age, genetic reasons or other), or her womb is unable to sustain a pregnancy. In the majority of cases, her inability to conceive is due to egg factors, but sometimes both her eggs are of insufficient quality and her womb is unable to sustain a pregnancy. In that case, she would need an egg donor and a gestational surrogate.

Could the egg donor be the surrogate mum?
Theoretically yes, but it adds a layer of complexity that is best avoided. If the intended mother’s eggs are of insufficient quality, it is strongly recommended that she makes use of an egg donor as well.

What does the law say wrt egg donation?
At this present time there are two laws which are relevant to donor eggs:

1. The Human Tissue Act

This law states that it is illegal to buy or sell any type of human tissue. Egg donors are not allowed to ‘sell’ their eggs. The donation must be done purely for altruistic reasons. However, they are entitled to compensation for travel expenses, time away from the work place, and discomfort from the injections and procedure.

The Human tissue act also requires the donor and recipient to remain anonymous to each other.

2. The Children’s Act

The surrogacy section of the new Children’s Act is still not yet enacted, although it is close to being signed off. Currently a standard adoption process must still take place between the surrogate and the commissioning couple.

This law states that the birth mother is the legal mother of the child. This implies that once the donor has donated her eggs, she no longer has any legal rights or responsibilities toward the child born from the eggs. The reverse applies in the case of a surrogate carrying a child.

Both recipient and donor are required to sign a consent form acknowledging that they have been informed and understand the legal aspects of egg donation.

Are things the same if it is donor sperm required? Yes

Is this market being abused? How so?
It isn’t abused, although there is a perception, by a few people who like to sensationalize this type of thing, that egg donors are simple, uninformed young women who lured or enticed and submitted to the process without any idea of what they are getting themselves into. Firstly, our donors are all 21 and older, most of them are in their late 20’s. Secondly, these are educated, intelligent women who are making an informed decision. They get briefed thoroughly by ourselves, and then again by the medical professionals. They are carefully screened both by a qualified psychologist (who will go over all the issues with them once again), and then again by the doctors.

How does payment for eggs get administered?
The egg donor is not paid for her eggs, she is however compensated for her travelling costs, time and inconvenience.

Would you become an egg donor?

What makes a woman willing to give up her eggs? Two donors explain their thought processes.

Your best friend just broke the news that she can’t have a baby. You’d love to help but the question is whether you’re ready to part with your precious eggs. Are you ready to be an egg donor?

An egg donation is the process by which a woman provides one or several (usually 10-15) eggs (ova, oocytes) for purposes of assisted reproduction or biomedical research. For assisted reproduction purposes, egg donation involves the process of in vitro fertilization as the eggs are fertilized in the laboratory.

So scientific terms aside, many people wonder what makes a woman want to become an egg donor? Two donors explain. (Names have been kept anonymous for privacy reasons).

Donor 1’s story

“My best friend was conceived by egg donation and she decided to donate her eggs so someone out there could have a family, just like her mother was able to.

“She spoke to me about it and at first I thought she was crazy but over time I understood her reasons and decided I would support her, I would go through the process with her.”

Donor 2’s story

“5 years ago I gave birth to a beautiful baby girl. She had big brown eyes that stared across at me from the other end of the room, and I know she couldn't see, but I know in my heart she knew where Mummy was, she knew.

“A year later, I found myself to be a single mum to this little angel who had done no wrong in her life. I feared that I would resent her as I could see her father in her, but that was not true. That little girl made me strong, she made me realize that my heart was bigger than I ever imagined, I loved her so much that I would move the world for her.

“Life moved on and that little girl, as small as she was, always saw herself as being my protector, I thought it was meant to be the other way around. As the years have gone by, I realized that yes, I did want to have another baby, just like my daughter, but my situation in life did not permit. I still had so much to do in life.

“One day I was on the internet and I saw an advert for egg donation, and that is when the thought crossed my mind: I want another baby but life does not permit me to have one now. There are women out there who are struggling to conceive and I could help them. I am young and healthy and I can help another woman experience the joy, the pleasure, the sheer magic of having a child. Another woman can have her dream fulfilled if I could but help.”

Research shows that donating your eggs is safe if it’s done correctly and with the correct professional medical care. However, the real concern isn’t a physical one but more an emotional one.

It’s not just about giving up your eggs. It’s about giving up a piece of you. While some women feel they can do it and have no emotional attachment to it, others don’t. But those who do donate are giving an amazing gift.

Read more on: http://www.nurture.co.za/

Article originally in Parent24

Gay Parenting – Navigating the Surrogacy Journey

Interestingly enough both my partner and I entered our relationship with no expectations of becoming parents. I think part of being gay is that you sort of accept that you may never be a parent and as such part of our ‘coming out’ process included the mourning of the loss of parenthood. Instead we envisaged a life where we would live vicariously through our siblings and friends who had become parents. Being uncles and God-parents seemed to be what was in store for us.

Well, who says paradigms can’t shift? It was my sister who first planted the seed by saying ‘you two would make wonderful parents!’. Parents? Us? Why not? Books, films and various articles all paint an attractive picture of how easy it is to adopt. And so we began exploring the option of adoption. After all, here we are, both well educated, are successful in our careers and have a spacious house to share with a child. Having graduated from the University of Google with my PhD, my frame of reference said that it will be easy to find an adoption agency, we would be screened and voila – new parents within at least 3 months! Plan the baby shower, design a nursery and start screening potential nannies! Well, all of that went out of the window when we realised that there is very little information on adoption in this country, adoption agencies seem to be an urban myth and we were alarmed at the open prejudice by some organisations that will not work with same-sex couples. In addition, we felt that we did not want to explore an inter-racial adoption as the fact that the child would be raised by two dads was already, in our eyes, a unique situation. Eventually we sourced a wonderful social worker, who was willing to work us but after having gone through the screening process, home studies the waiting began. After a year of waiting, with no baby, I continued to research and came across an article about infertility featuring NURTURE who were an egg donation agency ( and at that time, had a surrogacy programme).

As I reflect on the events leading up to this, in retrospect it is amazing how the pieces of the puzzle all slotted in. I recall picking up the phone for the first time and contacted Kim. My heart was beating, my palms sweating and I held my breath when I asked the question if they would work with a same sex couple. I nearly collapsed when she nonchalantly said it was not an issue! And so we entered yet another paradigm shift, this time that we could possibly be the genetic parent to a child!

Again we entered this surrogacy-IVF process rather naively, as there is so little information out there about surrogacy and in particular about same-sex couples choosing this option to parenthood. Those that have been through the process are reluctant to share their experiences with others and you find that you proceed using your own initiative. Our surrogacy experience has been one of learning, sharing and filled with disappointments and excitement. It has indeed been a roller-coaster ride! Our advice to any intended parents would be to look for the lessons learnt with each hurdle, to stay focused on the what you are wanting to achieve and to trust your instincts! At times we became so caught up in the ‘wanting to be parents’ that we missed some of the warning signs, which had we listened to may have saved us some heart ache. This said, the highs of surrogacy for us have far outweighed any of the disappointments. Some advice that we would suggest that is given some thought is:

1. Choose your fertility clinic wisely and make sure that the IVF coordinator will have time to answer your questions and be there to answer your questions, without you feeling that you are imposing. We changed clinics and our second clinic is worlds apart from our first experience.

2. Have clear expectations with your surrogate about expectations before, during pregnancy and after the birth.

3. Find a lawyer and social worker that you can connect with as they play a vital role in the whole process.

4. Be organized ahead of time, although the Child Act has recently changed, expect some confusion at government departments when you register the birth, apply for passport etc

5. Choose a gynaecologist and hospital that understands your unique needs. Again we were fortunate to find a doctor and a hospital, that although had never dealt with a same-sex surrogacy before, were keen to help! They made the birth of our daughter a wonderful experience for our whole family and we will forever be grateful to them for this!

6. Maintain a sense of humour!

As part of the process of surrogacy, you may have to consider selecting an egg-donor. This is such a personal aspect of the whole process. Both my partner and I looked at the profiles individually and on two occasions chose the same donor and our criteria for our selection was different. It is amazing to think that although we both looked at many profiles, we both ended up with the same choice. Our beautiful daughter resembles both of us in different ways and as she gets older, we have both found ourselves commenting on how she looks like the other! Our view on this is that the right donor is out there for you and something in the profile will attract you to her. Trust that intuition! If you are considering doing the process for a second time, plan ahead and try to secure the same donor so that the children will be biological siblings.

In terms of actual parenting it is surprising how often we are asked, “Who/where is the mummy?”. This question has so many implications for us. In terms of parenting, my partner was given 3 months ‘maternity’ leave so for practical purposes we consciously made a decision that he would be the one to stay in the hospital and to do all the things normally associated with a new mum. This does not in any way infer that I have not shared the role as parent. As in our relationship, we have not labelled or assign ourselves to specific roles, instead we chose to do those things that we feel comfortable and confident with. From the very beginning we had said that we need to be comfortable with ourselves and our relationship to answer such questions. Our philosophy is that we need to cultivate confidence from within our family unit in order to face the ‘outside world with its stereotypes’. When posed with this question, we have answered, “Her moms are angels and she has two dads!”. We will share information with people on the basis of what they need to know.

Another interesting concept is that we get the question, “How much did it all cost?”. Our decision is that we will not put a price on what it cost to have our child or children. So we normally chose not to answer this question from both a moral and personal perspective. It is strange to think that these are the two most common questions but I expect that people take comfort in contextualising our family set up for themselves. After all, we have been ahead of the characters from ‘ Brothers and Sisters’ so for many people the concept of surrogacy is still new.

How are we going to answer questions from our children? Again we had a lot of time to think about such things during our adoption screening. We had our surrogate and her family do a scrap book for our daughter, so that when the time comes, we can give it to her. This may help her process the steps we took to become parents. What we have decided is to explain things in an age appropriate manner – we have made no rules but are drawn to imagery that her mum is an angel and will deal with each situation in the best manner that we can. We expect some challenges along the way, it would be naive not to. Any parent will tell you same.

We have been so blessed on our journey towards becoming parents and we are reminded each day as we look at our daughter of the special people we have met along the way. From the team at Nurture, the other professionals and naturally the egg donor and our selfless surrogate for whom the words “Thank You” do not seem enough.

A final word of advice, do not enter this process thinking it is going to be a speedy process devoid of any emotion. Be realistic, don’t lose sight of the goal posts and take lessons from any of the set-backs you may encounter! As Kim said to us in the very beginning, “Fasten your seatbelt!”.

Enjoy and the best of luck with the journey that lies ahead.

Ricky Martin's Egg Donor Has a "Good Vibe"

Los Angeles - Ricky Martin used the internet to choose an egg donor for his twin sons.

The Puerto Rican singer – who is openly gay – chose both an egg donor and surrogate mother to carry his twins after spending hours poring over internet profiles.

Explaining the process to US TV show Access Hollywood, he said: "I sat in front of the computer and I started searching. It definitely was a very beautiful journey.

"I know what the donor looks like. Yeah, it's in the computer, you sit down for hours and look at different profiles."

When asked by the interviewer what made him choose the particular donor he settled on, Ricky replied: "It's a vibe thing, you know. In this case, it was like, I feel something in her eyes and her smile. Then you read the profile and you read her letter, and where she goes to school and she's very beautiful. And she is smart as well."

Ricky also described his nerves on the day of the birth, and his elation when he heard the first cries of his newborn twins Mateo and Valentino.

He recalled: "I received a phone call 'You're gonna be a daddy today, OK?' I was not in the delivery room, but I was in the little room next to it so I could hear the first cry."

The 38-year-old star hailed the twins' birth as a "miracle" and was astonished by the surge of emotion he felt when he held the babies for the first time.

On his feelings at that moment, he said: "This is real. Woah! OK, perfect. So I want to hold them. I need to hold them.

"I went to my room and the nurse gave them to me and I started holding them and I was like, 'This is amazing. I mean, it feels incredible. There is a God. This is miraculous and they do look like me."

The Livin' La Vida Loca singer also revealed he is a very hands-on father, changing nappies, waking, bathing and feeding his children, putting them to sleep and singing to them.

SOURCE: Celebrity Wonder.com

Egg Donation - Giving the gift of life

For 85% of the population, making a baby requires little more than a kiss, a cuddle and a few meaningful moments (or longer if you are lucky). For some it requires even less. However for 15% of the population it requires a bit more than the kiss, cuddle and sex routine. For some it takes months and even years. And for the heartbroken few, no matter how many times they do the baby-making dance, absolutely nothing happens. That is when hopeful mothers-to-be turn their hopes to assistance of another kind – egg donation.

The first successful egg donation in humans was achieved in 1984 and represented a major breakthrough in modern reproductive treatment. It gave hope to many women who were unable to conceive using their own eggs.

As egg donation comes out of the closet and becomes more mainstream, and as infertility issues are steadily on the increase, the demand for egg donors is increasing.

Although egg donation has been around for many years, it was previously aimed mostly at the international medical tourists who were among the few wealthy enough to afford it. But all that has changed with the launch of a new egg donor program in South Africa, one that is aimed specifically at local egg donors and future parents.

Nurture Egg Donor Program is the brainchild of two of the most passionate people in the world of infertility. Tertia Albertyn, an infertility patient who conceived her twins on her 9th IVF and Melany Bartok, an ex egg donor herself.

“We wanted to create an egg donor program that was affordable and available to local couples”, says Tertia. “Infertility is something I am passionate about. Helping others gives some kind of meaning and sense to all the pain and loss I went through”.

An egg donor is a healthy young woman who is between the ages of 20 and 34. These special young women donate a few of their eggs to a recipient who is unable to produce eggs from her own ovaries. Following their removal, the eggs are fertilized with the recipient’s male partner’s sperm or with donor sperm. The resulting embryos are then placed into the recipient’s uterus. She then has the amazing opportunity of becoming pregnant, carrying, and delivering a child to finally create the family she has so long hoped for. A donor gives one of the most beautiful gifts possible—the gift of potentially growing a family.

The first step in the process is for the potential donors to complete an initial application (available online at http://www.nurture.co.za/), which is used to screen issues like weight (donors may not be either under weight nor overweight), health, menstrual cycle and contraception. If these criteria are met, donors then complete a comprehensive application with full medical history, genetic heritage, physical and personal characteristics of themselves and their genetic family, their reasons for wanting to donate etc. Once approved, a face to face information session is scheduled in which donor are fully informed of entire process involved – what to expect, what is involved, what, if any, the potential risks are. If the donor decides they want to go ahead with the process, their anonymous profile is made available to view by potential recipients.

Once a donor has been chosen by the intended parents, she has to undergo a psychological assessment by a registered psychologist, as well as a full medical with the fertility clinic, including various blood tests etc. It is only after this process that the donation goes ahead. None of these costs are borne by the donor.

As is evident by the description above, the application and selection process for becoming an egg donor is a fairly rigorous one. “We want to make sure these young women are mentally, emotionally and physically healthy enough to undergo egg donation”, says Melany. “It is not a decision to be taken lightly, but most of our donors return for a second and third donation because they realize what a meaningful gift they are giving”.

Donors are compensated ZAR5,000 for their time, travelling costs and any inconveniences experienced during the donation process. This figure is guided by the South African Medical Ethics Committee and is not intended to pay for the eggs donated as donors donate their eggs as a gift of hope, not for monetary reward. The compensation also does not even begin to come close to reflecting the immense gratitude the Intended Parents feel.

“Egg donation is a truly wonderful thing; it gives hope where there previously was none. There are an increasing number of women out there who can finally call themselves ‘mother’ because of the generosity of others. We are honoured to be part of this process”.

For more information on the egg donor program, please visit http://www.nurture.co.za/

Melany Bartok
Melany has unparalleled insight into the world of egg donation. Not only is she the country’s leading Egg Donor Director, but having donated twice herself, she intimately understands the thrill and privilege of a being chosen as an egg donor. Melany’s honest, passionate and dedicated relationship with her donors is at the heart of her success. Melany lives in Table View with her two charming huskies and equally charming husband. Contact Melany on melany@nurture.co.za or 0766 848489

Tertia Albertyn
Tertia Albertyn is a recovering infertile and now mother to twins conceived on her 9th IVF. She has written extensively about her personal experience with infertility, both on her award winning blog (http://www.tertia.org/) and in her book ‘So Close’, detailing her five year battle to conceive. She is passionate about infertility, and has dedicated her time to assisting those who are still in the trenches. Tertia has a MBA from the University of Cape Town, and lives in Durbanville with her husband and two children. Contact Tertia on tertia@nurture.co.za or 0824418639

Choosing between Egg Donor and Surrogate

How to cope when they say,“I’m sorry…we’ve done all we can do apart from egg donation or surrogacy".

Article sponsored by Souad Dreyfus of Open Arms Consultants

You’ve tried so hard. You’re overwhelmed and emotionally bankrupt. You’ve spent endless amounts of energy and dollars in your longing to create your family. But tests, time and tears have not produced results, and now you are wondering…what’s next? Do I give up my dream? What about egg donation or surrogacy?

You are not alone.
Stop. Breathe. Step back and know that you are not alone. There are kind, caring professionals who can gently guide you toward your best decision. With your partner, talk to a counselor, find a support group or agency and process this difficult time in a healthy, open way.

Take time out.
Take time for yourself when you have exhausted traditional means of conceiving. Pause before moving to the next step. Pamper your body and soul with a healthy diet, gentle exercise, stress-busting rest and relaxation. Nurture your spirit with quiet prayer, meditation or readings according to your beliefs. Regroup.

Do your homework.
Choosing whether egg donation or surrogacy is right for you requires arming yourself with knowledge, but help is at hand. Websites, organizations and agencies offer information and consulting. Read testimonials of others who have created a family with the help of others. Learn.

Considerations: choosing an egg donor.
If your doctor reports that you need an egg donor, you may grieve about losing the genetic link to your child. Take time to process this loss. Many intended parents choose to focus on the joy of raising a child regardless of physical characteristics. This child will be your family’s treasure…chosen, planned for and delivered with great thoughtfulness.

Working with a reputable egg donor agency or a fertility clinic can be critically important, as they can help find an ideal match from a broad spectrum of donors with various cultural backgrounds and physical characteristics. Egg Donor agencies and fertility clinics often pre-qualify donors with requirements relating to age, health, education and maturity.

One of your biggest decisions will be whether to choose a donor who is anonymous, semi-known or known. An anonymous donor is one you will never meet. A semi-known donor is one who shares limited information. A known donor is friend, relative or even a stranger you have chosen through an agency, but one you will meet within agreed-upon boundaries.

Considerations: choosing a surrogate.
Surrogacy is the act of carrying a child for prospective parents. The child may be genetically theirs, or the egg and sperm may be obtained from donors. Many agencies offer online surrogate matching, and determining whether these agencies are authentic and qualified is the first step. Look for a real address and phone number. Ask if you can contact references.

Once you’ve selected the surrogacy agency, choosing a particular surrogate mother requires careful review of their qualifications (criminal background check, previous delivery records, support system, age, healthy BMI... ) and motives (materialistic, empathy with the infertile wife, the drive to generate parenthood for others...). You’ll speak personally with the candidate. Agencies may arrange conference calls before an actual face-to-face meeting. Be patient, as finding the right surrogate mom is beyond important.

“We were very skeptical,” shared one mother-to-be about her twins’ surrogate. “About 45 seconds into the conversation, we fell in love with her!” The parents soon realized that their surrogate shared values that meshed into their family’s culture. After meeting face-to-face, the mother-to-be said, “It was like it was meant to be! When we hugged, I felt like I was hugging my own sister.” Of course, not every surrogacy results in such kinship, but using a reputable agency’s selective matching process can significantly improve your results.

Are you ready to take the next step?
There’s so much to think about. Take time out. Learn all you can. Contact a reputable agency. And finally, reach deep inside and pull out your secret weapon: women’s intuition. If a voice inside insists on keeping the dream alive of starting your family, then there’s only one thing to do: chase your dreams!

Original Article found at: http://www.resolve.org/family-building-options/choosing-between-egg-donor-and-surrogate.html?log-event=sp2f-view-item&nid=179359402